I am You. I understand how scary, frustrating and lonely this process can be.
I am a caregiver too.
On October 29, 2012, my mother and father (ages 89 and 90 respectively), were displaced from their home, courtesy of Hurricane Sandy.
Not only did floodwaters fill the basement (so much so that initially we couldn’t open the basement door), there was enough water on the first floor to warp the parquet floors.
We were told that it would cost upwards of $100,000 to make the house safe enough for them to return. A plan B was needed and needed FAST. My husband and I thought about them staying with us, but we feared for their safety. High-sided bathtub requiring a certain level of flexibility to get into and out of. Heavy steel front door that requires a certain amount of upper body strength to open.
So, instead, they stayed with relatives while my husband and I searched for housing for them.
The question, of course, was whether they should get an apartment or go into a facility. It was determined that going into a facility would be the best for them. They were starting to have physical difficulties especially with navigating the stairs in the house.
This meant getting them onto Medicaid, and boy, did we get a crash course. Did you know that there are three different kinds of Medicaid? We didn’t. Did you know that most assistive living facilities do not currently accept Medicaid straight out? Most require a “spend down”, with different facilities requiring different amounts of “spend down”.
Throughout our long months, we relied heavily on those who had already gone through the process we were dealing with, mostly friends and relatives. These people were the ones who recommended that we consult with a geriatric social worker and, later in the process, an elder attorney. I also turned to the Internet for information and was, frankly, shocked at how little there was and what little there was so scattered within Cyberspace.
This website is an outgrowth of that.
Let this be a resource for you.